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KING

 

 

 

 

 

By Oscar O. Bunoan

Son:  Dad, isn't it that the Father is always the King of the House? That's what our teacher told us.

Dad:  (Very flattered) That is very true, my son.

Son:  How come you're always scared of Mom?

Dad:  Ah..ah..ah… but your mom is the Ace of this house… (darn!)

DRINKING

After a nice and lovely party…

Drunk Hostess:  Thanks for coming but don't drink and drive, okey? Hik

Drunk Guest: And why not? Hik

Drunk Hostess:  Because you might stop suddenly and spill your drink, duh!

 

DON'T WORRY

A daughter saw her mom bathing her little brother, who is naked to the bone.

Daughter:  (Kind of worried)  Mom, how come I do not have one like that like my brother has.

Mother: Don't you worry, my dear… you will have lots of them when you grow up.  

ANO BA

Merong isang babae at isang lalake ang nakaligtas at napadpad sa isang maliit na isla nang maaksidente ang kanilang bapor dahil sa dumaang bagyo.  Pagkaraan ng dalawang buwan.., nagkaroon sila ng relasyon.

Babae:  Mahal mo ba ako?

Lalake:  Ah… eh.. Hindi.

Babae:  (Dismayado) Eh bakit nakipagrelasyon ka sa akin kung ganyan ka pala?

Lalake:  Hellerrr… Meron pa ba akong pagpipiliang iba? Bruha.

HINDI BALE

Pare 1:  Pare, nawawala ang credit card ko, pero ang balak ko huwag nang i-report?

Pare 2:  Bakit naman?  Delikado yan, pare.

Pare 1:  Hindi na bale pare ko. Kasi, mas maliit mag-charge yung magnanakaw kaysa sa Misis ko.

CREDIT CARDS

Ikinasal sa judge and mag-asawang Peter at Helen.  (Medyo palabiro ang judge).  Sa halip na sabihing "You may now kiss the bride."  Ang sabi ay…"Mister, isurender mo na ang mga credit cards mo kay misis sa harap ko, kung gusto mong maging masaya ang pagsasama niyo".

NAG-ABROAD

Juan:  Grabe, pare!  Yung ka-text ko nag-abroad na yata.

Ponce:  Bakit mo naman nasabi yan? Hindi man lang ba nag-paalam sa iyo?

Juan:  Nagpaalam naman. Kaya lang iningles ako "The subscriber cannot be reached". Nasa Amerika yata.

 

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